I think about that experience of Pina Bausch – like what she meant to me and the opportunity that I had to see her. I feel like because I was guided to that last performance it was like that was guidance that was saying to me that I was being Guided by Spirit something higher above above and to give me that richness of her the world that she had created.
I feel like I’m been guided as a black woman and like even though there have been defeats and there have been serious setbacks. My guidance never leaves me. It’s my North Star and that’s how we that’s where we have to live.
Listening to Source—if you talk about listening to Source and how you find Source—it’s like… can you smell a plant? My aunt, I had an old aunt, and I think the first time that I got really tuned into it was when she was really old. She would take me to the grocery store and we would pick out fruit, like watermelon or melons, and she would have me smell it. Slowly but surely, you would be able to get to the fruit and you could smell which one had the sweetest taste.
That’s Source. There’s Source. There’s vitality. There’s life inside of it. And she would be like, “Smell this, smell that.” So it’s like you develop your sense of smell. You develop your sense of connection to the Earth. You sense the time. You hear the wind. You start with nature. And then suddenly, you feel this vitality inside of you that’s inside other creatures. And that’s Source. That’s that Source. That thing that’s brimming inside of you. That makes you want to run. That makes you feel like the sunlight. And you turn off your mind. And the more you turn off your mind, and the more you listen to these internal things that are around us, the more it comes to you.
As I started clarifying and started—more teachers came to me. I studied Qigong. I studied with Chinese teachers who work with Source. I learned Tai Chi Qigong. I started practicing that. It seemed really natural to me. And then once you start learning how to—whatever you find that brings you to Source—it could be cooking, music, whatever—then suddenly people are attracted to you.
When you are in Source, people are attracted to you. When you are not in Source—when you are twisted, angry, sad—people are not. Not to say that you can’t be those things, but now I know that I have to repair myself. Or if I see someone like that, I see it. I feel for them. But it’s more like an internal repair you have to do. And then wait. If we were all walking around like that, we would just be much more happy to be here. To have this wild and precious life.
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